So I guess it'll be the first time in a while where I have posted something quite long. I never had the time actually, I recently lost time to be who I really was before because of some things or persons. I wouldn't need anyone to tell me that I have been changing because I know I have been changing. Yet, unfortunately, I haven't been doing something to return myself to normal. My grades have been plunging. The good thing now is that I have become very active in class. I have been submitting most of my projects in time and I've been giving less time to my cellphone.

Well, the main reason why I'm pouring this out is because I believe that too much dreaming is bad. Daydreaming, night dreaming, it hinders me from what I should really do.

Well. It`s long test week. Time for me to hit the notes again. I really want to improve my grades and restore the lost trust in me. Now that I've decided to run for student council, I might lose time again.

It's been cold the past few days here. I have been pretty much sick, physically, emotionally, socially and worse, spiritually. I don't know what's wrong with me. I want some epiphany or some sign to awaken me and say, "ROD, WHAT THE F*CK IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

And the thing that really pisses me off-- LOVE. Well, I`m not saying that I am in love because I myself am unsure if it is love or just an infatuation, that's the problem. Me thinking about it, worse, her is like mental torture to me that I can't really solve. When I turn to the left, there is a couple, even to the right, everywhere.

I'm back to cramming. I need help to redirect my life.
-Rod